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Hello, leaders of Dining Services.

We are the Harcombe Anonymous.
Over the years, we have been watching you. The decline of our once acceptable dining hall saddens us. With this most recent semester, we find the failing of Harcombe can no longer be tolerated. Here are our demands:

1. Do not overcook the salmon. The teriyaki salmon was your best.
2. Do not serve “creative” dishes, such as Chuck Wagon Stew or “Lunch Lady Surprise Night”.
3. If you are serving chicken at the Exhibition station, do not also serve chicken at the Home Cooking station during the same meal.
4. There is a reason that the only cookies left over by the end of lunch are oatmeal. Seldom few find them appetizing.
5. Beef should be served at least every two days at the exhibition station, not once a week.
6. Roasted eye of round was good. Bring it back.
7. Make sure spinach quesadillas actually have cheese in them.
8. Do not under any circumstances use wheat bread as pizza crust.
9. Serve more black eyed peas.
10. The current roast beef served is 90% fat. After being served a slice, only one bite of actual meat can be found in that piece.
11. Chicken pot pie is a delicious meal that should be included more often.
12. Make sure the eggs in omelets are not liquid when served.
13. Applesauce should be present at the salad bar during all meals.
14. The pasta bar was a huge success. Bring it back.
15. BBQ should be served more often, but let students apply their own choice of sauce.
16. Fried foods should include chicken fingers more often.
17. Make sure the bananas provided are actually ripe.
18. Let students serve side dishes themselves. Having an employee do it makes lines three times as long.
19. The ice cream bar on Fridays is greatly missed.
20. Bird dogs are disgusting.
21. Include a greater variety of fruit, such as pears and peaches.
22. Beef pot pie should never be served.
23. Beef wellington, on the other hand, is quite tasty.
24. Pork chops are known uniformly throughout this group as “rock chops”. Cook them less often.
25. Rice crispy treats should only be made with rice crispies. Not trix, cocoa crisps, or whatever random cereal you have lying around.
26. There aren’t enough fresh cookies.
27. The perch served is not edible.
28. Green peas are a rare sight anymore. Almost everyone likes green peas.
29. The sandwich area needs an additional employee to speed up the line.
30. No middle school field trips should be allowed during peak dining hours.
31. The soup of the day is almost always empty by mid-meal. Make more.
32. Watermelon at all meals would be a welcome sight.
33. Besides Dorothy, the sandwich line ladies are evil.
34. The random stalks of broccoli mixed with cauliflower is not an acceptable food source. Quit being cheap and buy actual broccoli heads.
35. Corned beef served at Harcombe is disgusting. Do not waste decent quality meat in such a manner.
36. We live too far from the coast for fish to be served as regularly as it is.
37. The pork loin is usually quite tasty. Have it more often if good quality beef is too difficult to come by.
38. The omelet line should not close before 10:00 AM.
39. Everyone loves Amos. Give that man a raise.
40. Chocolate chip cookies should not be 80% chocolate, 20% raw dough. Ease up on the chips and cook them longer.
41. Find a way to keep the rolls fresh. They are almost always stale by the time of consumption.
42. The deserts are rather disgusting. Take lessons from Schilletter.
43. Never, ever serve oysters, clams, or any other shellfish. Almost everyone gets sick from them.
44. Replace the cups more often. There are far too many cracked ones still in circulation.
45. Wax beans are universally disliked. Just try lima beans instead.

The Harcombe Anonymous will be observing your actions closely.

Expect us.